This is why you should always ride Kawasaki.
Riding past cows, horses, deer, elk, and other wildlife can be a pretty, as long as they stay far away. The moment they come near you, they’re potentially dangerous, especially if you’re traveling by motorcycle. So, what happens when an encounter of the bovine kind happens while you’re stopped? One motorcyclist at the 2019 Tour de France found out the hard way.
The motorcyclist wasn’t wearing any kind of identifying jersey, number or other markings to indicate that he was part of the race support team. So, we don’t know his story, and I can’t speculate on exactly why he was there. In any case, no motorcyclist wants to end up in his situation. If you can't view the video for any reason, I've included a gallery below that shows exactly what happened.
Gallery: Cow Tips Motorcyclist: Tables Turned At Tour De France
The rider in question was standing peacefully at a complete stop, just minding his own business. Suddenly, a small herd of nearby cattle rolled up on him and took him down like it was nothing. The leader of these bovine bandits seemed like she may have been thinking, “I’m going to ruin this guy’s day, hold my bell.”
Then, several cattle followed the first one, but a brave dissenter cow suddenly rushed in front of the herd, in the opposite direction. The motorcyclist’s Guernsey-adjacent* guardian successfully kept most of the herd away, except for the leader. Unfortunately, that leader was then free to muscle the biker over by using a simple shoulder check. Then, that jerk of a cow just kept on walking without a backward glance.
The other cattle quickly got in line behind the leader, and all members of the group proceeded to march coldly past the scene of this particular bovine crime. All that was left in their destructive wake was a trail of motorcyclist tears, and possibly some condensation from his bike’s exhaust tip. Secret cattle revenge mission: complete.
Clearly, the NBC Sports team commentators at the Tour de France don’t ride motorbikes, because they comment on how picking up such a heavy bike would be impossible. While it might not be an easy task every time, most riders with minimal experience can pick their bike back up when it goes down. Even if a herd of cattle suddenly ganging up on you isn’t a regular occurrence, the concept of dropping your bike is usually a matter of “when,” and not “if.”
Did this band of violent cattle thugs (which I very much hope calls itself “The Cow Boys”) hold a grudge against this particular rider from an earlier encounter? Maybe they don’t like BMWs and simply disapproved of his choice of bike. We’ll never know, but at least, this video will be around to amuse us forever.
* = This is France, and I’m no cattle expert. While I suspect the cow in question isn’t a Guernsey, the alliteration was irresistible.